rant...

oh wow, I just read this post I saved as a draft about awhile ago. It's a bit dramatic, but has just given me a bit of perspective. =) Here's what was going on with me a couple month ago...


hmmm... I'm trying not to read into this too much, but lately it has been feeling like things just slip from my fingers. Two internship opportunities this past summer and for reasons that don't have anything to do with me, the companies can't hire me. Ok, it is understandable, but I'm having a super hard time letting it go!
So, next I'm trying to get a part-time job here in VA while my fiance in learning that he won't be working anytime soon since he needs shoulder surgery (not fun at all). So it's up to me to make some extra cash while we are anticipating real job opportunities. Babysitting has been the only opportunity working out so far. Yes, I am a college graduate- professional babysitter... wooooo! (in case you didn't catch the sarcasm, no that is not my profession of choice.)
So now I get a call from Applebees (wa-hooo) for an interview, but I soon find out the boy is having his surgery at the exact same time. So, long story short, they never reschedule the interview as promised, despite my calling and asking about it. Did I mention the day of his surgery they end up keeping him there and giving him his happy meds. before realizing that they cannot actually perform the surgery that day since everything is running late and it is outpatient sooooo they send us home and reschedule his surgery for two weeks later.
Today is the day after his real surgery and he is miserable. He has pretty much been sitting on the couch feeling queasy from the meds. since yesterday. It's awful to see someone you love in pain. And you can only do so much to try and comfort them.
But then I need to leave because I have an interview with Bath and Body Works today. I get in the car but... it doesn't start. I turn the key again and again and still... nothing. ok, ohhhhhh, the light was left on. The battery is dead. In fact, the car repair place who just fixed the door handle (for the second time since they screwed it up the first time) left it on!!!!!!!11
My fiance's Aunt helps me hook up the jumpers to start the car, but they start smoking after she hooks them up! She is about to start the car when I tell her not to, good thing she didn't. Then she proceeds to unclamp one of the cables off and burns her finger. craaaaaap. Needless to say I didn't make it ot this interview either. But the manager was kind enough to allow me to come in on Monday.
You know what? I didn't really want to leave him today anyway to go to the interview. I wanted to be home to take care of him.
Just seems like it has not really been my year. It is important to look forward and make something happen for us. But what? I have no idea.

honeyedperceptions?

A thought/concept that I will expand on later...

"Honey is a sweet, comforting flavor or goopy bee barf clouding our view."
~Jeanette Lyn Henry

It is all in how you look at it. Perception is a big part of the way we live our lives. And emotion directly effects our perception. I am slowly coming to this understanding and striving to implement this idea into my life. I feel everyone has a choice to look at situations in a positive or negative way. There are times when it feels everything is going against me, but it is imperative that I find those positive glimmers. Of course one could argue in extreme cases, but for now I'm just putting the thought out there and speaking in generalities.

what this blog is about

This blog is a place for me to post thoughts I have, sort of a journal. I'm not really sure why I've decided to start a blog to do this, except that maybe it will make me write more often. I don't by any means consider myself to be a writer. However, writing seems to help me sort my ideas out. It is a therapeutic process more than anything else.